I finally realized, I need to TAKE THE TIME. Take the time to enjoy my life, enjoy my blessings and realize that each and every day, as I wake up to take care of my family and teach them life’s lessons that I am living my dream, but every now and then it’s nice to know that special someone cares.
I know I am strong, but I am also incredibly stubborn. I’ve made plenty of mistakes and life with me is never easy. I tell people that right from the start. I can be very jaded but I’m also lonely at times. At least I can be honest with myself about that.
Life can also be very sweet with me. I love to be held and if someone that I care about will do that, I promise then I will show them how sweet that life can be. I’m needful, not needy. There’s a difference. I’m human. I break at times and sometimes a girl just needs that special guy that she loves to take his hand, lift her by the chin, and look her in the eyes, and say, “It’s going to be alright.” It’s always nice to know that the one you love has got your back.
I can be confusing as hell. I know that. I’m neither black and white, nor gray. I’m both east and west at times, but if you can put up with me, then I’ll promise that I will try and give every bit of my heart to someone, if they try to see me completely and not judge, lie to me, lie about me, or cheat on me. That’s all that I ask.
My words can cut like a knife. Sometimes my mouth speaks quicker than my head and quite often jumps in before my heart when I’m angry or hurt, however, cold I may be, it’s at least honest. When I’m sorry, I am truly sorry and I will apologize from the heart. No matter if I speak it or write it, the things that I say always come right from my heart.
I’m learning as life goes that it’s hard and terribly unfair. People are cruel and sometimes I think they enjoy making mine harder. I’ve learned a lot along the way and know I will continue to strive for the best that I can do. I’ve already proven that. Deep down inside, I’m still just a girl. No matter what the exterior attitude portrays, I still need someone every now and then that says they have Band-aids to fix me. It's just going to take some time to find that kind of trust again, but once I do it will be such a sweet feeling.
